Category: Geordie Jokes

Geordie & The Freeman Heart Surgeon

Based on a true story ūüėõ A Consultant Heart Surgeon at the Freeman Hospital arrives at Geordie’s¬†bed & draws the curtain “How are you doing Mr Smith?”, he asks Geordie “Wey not to bad Doctor ye knaa, cannit grumble” “Well I suppose you could Mr Smith, I have been looking at your latest test results …

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Geordie & The Foul Mouthed Parrot

Geordie’s¬†parrot would not stop swearing and¬†one day in a fit of temper he¬†put it in the freezer and¬†told it that it was¬†not getting out until it stopped using foul language. When the swearing eventually stopped,¬†Geordie opened the freezer and the parrot said, “Alreet man,¬†a’l stop¬†swearing, but¬†a have¬†one question, … what the hell¬†did the¬†turkey do?”¬†ūüėÄ

Geordie Windaz Too Thoosand

I remember seeing this excellent spoof of microsoft’s windows operating system, however, I havent seen any Windaz updates since then. Has anybody else come across a different version on their travels around the web? If so please use the comment form below to tell us the link. Click for larger image  

Geordie’s Over The Moon He’s Having A Baby

Geordie phoned his mother in law¬†and told her that her daughter¬†had been rushed into the hospital¬†and was about to give birth. His¬†Mother In Law asked if she was dilated “ah don’t know about her, cos she’s¬†off her head on gas & air¬†right now” Geordie replied, “but¬†am over¬†the bloody¬†moon” ūüėÄ

The Best Salesmen Are Geordies – A Fishy Tale

Geordie moved to London and went to Harrods looking for a sales job. Mohamed Al Fayed was doing the interviews and asked Geordie whether he had any sales experience?” Well¬†ah was a canny salesman back in Newcastle, but the firm closed down so¬†ah thought I’d try me luck in London”.¬† After a few more questions …

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